Stephanie B. McAuliffe

Helping women rise above the chaos of living with an alcoholic

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IT'S TIME TO RISE above the chaos of the SITUATION WITH YOUR ALCOHOLIC

Many of us have been affected by a loved one’s drinking. 53% of us, in fact.

We spend much of our time focused on them. Trying to get them not to drink, or not want to drink, or thinking about their drinking. We get lost because it keeps pulling us in.

Yet, we’re not talking about what’s going on.

There’s a silence because many of us grew up in families where “we don’t talk about these things.” We were taught by our parents, who were taught by theirs, to not talk about what was happening under our roof. Or we were taught to tough it out.

When you don’t feel like you can talk about the situation, like you don’t have a voice, the negative energy gets bottled up inside. You’re tired. Sometimes you don’t know how you get through your day. You ache. Or you avoid the situation so you don’t have to go home.

  • As their drinking increases, our tendency to isolate also increases.
  • We’re embarrassed to be out with them because of their actions when they’re drunk.
  • We stop getting together with friends as couples.
  • Our friends often don’t get what’s going on / won’t understand, so we don’t talk with them about what’s really happening.
  • There’s the shame because you can’t believe you’re in the situation you’re in.

I know this all too well because I lived it. I am the 4th generation of women in my family affected by growing up and living with alcoholics.

Yes, it runs in families. And yes, we’re often attracted to what we grew up with. But that’s the old story. It is possible to break the cycle.

It’s time for a paradigm shift. It’s time for you to bring a voice to your story. It’s time for you to reclaim your energy for you. It’s time to break free, even if nothing about your relationship changes.

It is possible to rise above the chaos of the situation with your alcoholic. You are worthy to experience the joy that is your birthright.

On Best Books as One of the Top Must-Reads for Children of Alcoholics

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WHY read this BOOK?

Here's what initial readers are saying:

The Message in the Bottle is an inspiring tale and a triumph of spirit. Stephanie's account is ruthlessly honest, deeply insightful and thought-provoking. She has used her hard-won wisdom to provide hope and to lay a trail of crumbs marking the way to help others break free from this devastating legacy.

- Annabel M.

I see a reader new to "recovery" feeling an openness and space to really think, for us recovery travelers I see honest reminders to keep going! Stephanie shows the honesty with yourself that really needs to happen before you can begin to heal and truly forgive. Truth will set you free to heal, forgive and grow.

- Tammi F.

You give the reader trust in knowing more about you in a deliberate but friendly tone. I liked the appreciation of the yin and yang of things like judgment; and the nonjudgmental aspects of what are very challenging problems--those of self-denial, codependency, addiction, problems with families of origin and--ultimately--leading a life of purpose and balance (and, dare I say, happiness...).

- Jennifer K.

Your openness really made me dig deep into my past as to what continuously to this day causes my weight issues. You have expressed yourself in a way that I believe the every day person can relate to. I believe many others will identify maybe not with the same circumstances you had, however the processes you have documented can relate to anyone.

- Kathleen H.

The Message in the Bottle is one of those books that allows a reader to connect into the world and life of Stephanie and at the same time, invites reflection into ones own world. Those who have felt the burden of living in an alcoholic world will connect into the memories shared in this book and have the opportunity to explore and unravel their own experience through the questions asked along the way. While not an easy topic, The Message in the Bottle reads with honesty and vulnerability, while providing hope to those who have experienced similar.

- Stacey B.

This book will be a gift and a blessing for anyone who has grown up in an environment with substance abuse. It invites the reader to go deeper and look into their own life for similar patterns. It's real, raw and triumphant in the end. What I love most is how Stephanie leaves you with tools to work with.

- Lise C.

It is easy to fall prey to the desire for control -- even more so when everything is spiraling out of control. Stephanie McAuliffe is just another person, just like you or me. The way she is unique and remarkable -- and the reason why you should pick up The Message in the Bottle -- is that she is embracing the power of letting go. Releasing the guilt and the story, instead of gripping tight with both hands. One day at a time. A work in progress. You are not alone in the chaos. Stephanie's been there too. She wants to help you step around the hole, instead of falling in again.

- Liz P.

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